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Shannon asks…..
We all go out for a sporting event, our teams doing really good and a friend buys us all a round. What would you say/do? Do you follow peer pressure or do you realize if “friends” don’t support your sobriety then they were never true friends.
Dear Shannon,
The presence of peer pressure is a common issue for people who are in early recovery. Let’s face it, alcohol is everywhere! For some faiths, you cannot even avoid it at a church service on Sunday morning. While that may be a bit of an extreme example, booze is the celebration and medication of choice for the majority.
Your friends may not understand the depth of your alcohol problem. I wouldn’t say that they are malicious, they are just following cultural norms after all, appreciate the gesture but follow up with a firm “no, thank you”. For the sake of your sobriety, it is important to own the moment and use this as an opportunity to better explain to your mates what the deal is. It is not required to expose all of your intimate addiction details, but I find a general explanation reinforces your recovery. Being open and honest with them may not only improve your relationship with them but may better prepare them to handle a similar situation in the future.
For me, I had to skip certain events that I knew would make drinking too easily accessible. At 7+ years, I still don’t go to bars or parties centered around booze. I was an extreme alcoholic and needed an extreme recovery. This isn’t to say that I would definitely drink if I went, I simply don’t have the desire to be around that environment anymore. It is also helpful if an event is required, bring someone who will stay dry with you. Powers by number, just as easy as it is to lapse around drinking, it is easy to stay sober around others who are also.
Do you have a question?
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